Tuesday, July 23, 2013

Project Runway 12: Episode 1: Eco-Terror

It's the very first episode of Project Runway's 12th season and already the judges have f**ked up. They eliminated the wrong person. They elected to keep a goofball who definitely deserved to go because he made the stupidest dress. He was spared for the sole reason that he will cause drama in future segments. That person is Timothy, a pretentious flake obsessed by "sustainable" fashion with minimum carbon impact so the unicorns will not be endangered. (Earth to Timothy: Unicorns are mythical.) That means no makeup or hairstyling for the model and she goes barefoot. But that doesn't mean Timothy himself can't look fabulous by stealing the girl's high heels and wearing them. It just gets crazier. His dress was an awful raggedly thing that looked like a melted cheese sandwich with too much brown mustard. Not only that, he had a whole insane backstory with choreography for the garment--something about World War II and origami and Hiroshima victims--pointless as well as offensive. If you have to explain the dress, forget it.

Instead of booting this nutjob, they got rid of Angela whose tear-drop hoodie wasn't as awful as Timothy's trainwreck. Tim Gunn could have used his brand-new "save" power to redeem a contestant from being eliminated. But he can only use it once and this was the very first episode (Hey, they have more than one non-elimination round on Amazing Race, I don't see why Tim can only have one save all season). At least now, Gunn will get to sit with judges and make comments, but only during the "closer look" segment when the judges actually get up close and personal with the models and the garments.

It looks like Timothy will not be the only source of tension: Sandro, a Russian, Freddie Mercury look-alike is a powder keg just waiting for a match. "I tell truth and not everybody like," he said during the Road to the Runway one-hour pre-premiere special. Also, his taste level is questionable to say the least. In his audition, he presented a crocheted nearly topless number that looked like that awful item designed by the former prostitute who befriended Mary on that episode of The Mary Tyler Moore Show (see photo). In Sandro's first design, the model's lady parts were dropping out of his bejazzeled flapper nightmare. She looked like a drunken Christmas tree. In previews for upcoming episodes, he stomps out in a rage and threatens to break the camera on the street outside of Parsons.

Other upcoming drama includes a clash between Timothy and his fellow Milwaukeeian (is that a word) Miranda, the army vet. They look like brother and sister, the same hair and heavy-framed glasses, and since they come from the same town, their sibling rivalry must be extreme.

Also Kate from last season is back based on fans' voting for a returning contestant. I'm sorry, I can't even remember her or any of the other potential returnees.

So far I like Braden, the former Mark Morris dancer, and Sue, the self-taught tall blonde who didn't know how to operate a modern sewing machine. Both of their designs were elegant and creative. For once the judges agreed with me, giving them first and second place respectively. I want Timothy and Sandro gone, but they will probably hang on as long as the producers think these two will cause more stress and conflict.

1 comment:

  1. Project Runway is a reality TV series which focuses on fashion industry. It is hosted by Heidi Klum and the mentor is the brilliant Tim Gunn who I truly adore. At the beginning there are around 15 designers (contestants) and in every episode they need to make an outfit according to the task they were given. At the end of the episode judges will decide which design is the weakest and that designer will go home. The best 3 are going to the finale and they will make the final collection which will be presented at the New York Fashion Week. The best designer wins great prizes that can enormously change their careers.